Saturday, March 28, 2009

my daughter

, originally uploaded by benzismama.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

every little thing

, originally uploaded by benzismama.

is gonna be alright.......

Wednesday, March 25, 2009


, originally uploaded by benzismama.

my favorite color

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

feeling sketchy

, originally uploaded by benzismama.

My dad, the artist.

My little brother, Cody
My grandmother

I haven't been taking pictures. I don't know what's wrong with me. I have been drawing some. My dad uploaded a bunch of his work on his myspace page (the fact that he has a myspace page cracks me up!). I wish I had an ounce of his natural talent. I think he's brilliant. These are a few of my favorites.

Saturday, March 14, 2009


What a compliment to have Brene Brown comment on my blog and listening to my playlist! This woman is amazing and if you don't know who she is, check her out over at It is always incredibly inspiring to see strong, intelligent women helping other women reach their full potential. This is what Brene does. She teaches, inspires, and lives & loves with her WholeHeart.

I had half a mind to write about Authenticity and my turning 30 next month and how those two things are taking up more than their fair share of space in my brain at the moment, but you know, it's all just a little too personal for a public forum. I think I'd rather not give it all away. Read Brene's site. It's really good.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

My own aha! moment

, originally uploaded by benzismama.

Since I started putting pressure on myself to become a professional photographer, I've shut down creatively. I haven't even picked up my camera in days. I've gotten so stuck on my lack of technical skill and knowledge and profit, that I've just stopped taking pictures. I've stopped wanting to take pictures because what's the point? My photography is amateur and flawed and I don't have money to invest in better lenses and and and.......
I realize now what's going on here. Somewhere along the way, I decided that I'm not good enough, nobody looks at my work anyway, and I'm losing money on this, so why bother.
This isn't good. Not good at all.
I love photography. I'm an artist at heart. When it comes from my heart, it's good. When I do it for the pure joy of it, it's good. When I stop putting pressure on myself to make money, it comes to me. It finds me.
My sister said something to me a few weeks ago when I was really struggling with my future. She said "You are a photographer, Tracie. It doesn't matter if you decide to become a nurse or a teacher or whatever, you will always be a photographer. It will always come bubbling up to the surface because it's who you are. You can have both."
I never thought of it that way. I've always seen Success or Failure.
The thing about photography is that anybody can take a good picture. Anybody can buy a D-SLR and the best lenses and other equipment available. Anybody can learn everything there is to know about white balance and aperture and shutter speed and make great pictures and make money doing it.
It's about so much more than those things to me. It always has been and that's really why I was never in any hurry to learn the technical stuff. I'm an artist. I don't have to color in the lines. I can make money with other parts of my brain.
This is for me. If it touches other people, that's nice, too.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009


, originally uploaded by benzismama.

I'm running low on inspiration these days. The sun is coming, though. Spring will soon be here.